my life

After Mary Oliver i don’t want the world to call to me  to see the wild geese  in all their liberty  meanwhile every mountain  every pebble  every dogwood, every magnolia  screams his name.  “meanwhile the world goes on” but i don’t. i can’t.  how can i?  grief envelopes me.  extinguishes me.  i am no good.  24 feb 2026, yl

After Bhanu Kapil imprisoned by doubt  by the fantasies of my own mind  a puppet to my emotion.  the burden of uncertainty  of missed memories  lost connections  haunted by what-if’s and why’s  and yet  reclusive is my heart  she is solaced  by the clarity of absence  tranquility? solitude?  consequence? or liberation?  3 feb 2026, yl

oh, to hope  like flowers blooming  in fields  that had been barren  for months. sharing their scents  their colors their beauty  reborn.  and i  certain of the future  in my hands hope. oh, how i hope. 4 dec 2024, yl

Sometimes I wonder where forgotten dreams hide. When the winds, fierce and unforgiving, or the waves of false promises and coupled responsibilities envelop my soul. I see her fighting. She is like a mouse, scampering frantically, towards a world that doesn’t exist. She will never understand my disdain, for she only knows the company of my heart. It can’t be helped. Bury yourself before you accompany my dreams, wherever they end up. Don’t let me lose you too. I wish they would disappear, these silly dreams, so I can be freed from the graveyard of my aspirations. It can’t be helped. We are worn, weary, wilted from the weight of our forgotten dreams. 27 jan 2026, yl

  the sun’s embrace the bustle of traffic   masking my exhaustion i turn my head         eyes vacant. are you there? are you coming? what am i waiting for? 20 jan 2026, yl

time trickling  dancing marching forward.  and i  swept up  in its waves in its chaos.  paralyzed.  drowning in a sea of choices  of opportunities am i doing enough? am i enough?  3 dec 2024, yl